I was in the wake up mode from an early doze to bed and this inclination to go surfing is such a no-no, but here I am, waking my thoughts.
The post below me got this comment 'be careful, be very careful.' I wonder why she/he said that.
Maybe because obviously, there must be some hidden meanings in one of the lines there. And yes, I am careful. I don't want to wreck my life with whims, especially the void kind.
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I was looking through some photographs of old classmates and I was wondering about how rich they must be with all money could buy. But, are they really happy?
I ask myself that question and I can honestly answer that I am.
Sure, I can't afford everything, nor any temporal things at this point in time but it's funny because I am not wanting more. I mean, there are certain things that I do want to have that I can't afford, but it did not stop me from feeling this contentment.
Maybe because I happen to have someone in my life who makes me feel that way - my family.
There were times, I was wondering and asking God to give higher meaning in my life, I guess, subtly, He already did but I just ignored the signs.
On a higher level, I contribute to making the world a better place by sacrificing my own - I think that's one of chronic sufferers' missions in life.
Now I realize that, even if I do want to make other lives better, it's time to start with my own - being what God wants me to be for my family, with my family, in my family.
I was so focused on wanting to do good for other people, I forgot that I can make that difference in my own circle starting from myself moving towards my immediate ones.
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I've been suffering from chronic mild pains most of my life, young as I am, but I guess, it's one of the things I have to go through to be closer to God.
Then in times that I began to crumble, I always reflect on my hubby's mom who went through a lot but was able to go through it all.
So pain, and life's tribulations will not make me wither, but when I quit.
And I have no thoughts of ever quitting.